What Are You Bringing to the Table?

As Thanksgiving approaches, I’ve been thinking about all the tables we gather around—not just for food, but in our relationships too. It’s common to hear the question, What are they bringing to the table?

Let’s be real: when we ask that, it’s often about the things the world values—how much money someone has, their education, their job, or their potential to have more. But have you ever stopped to think about what you bring to the table?

Some years ago, I found myself disillusioned by what I thought the person I was building a relationship with was beginning to know about me and him. I thought that what I shared and what he shared was bringing us closer to understanding who we were.

But I started to notice that his actions didn’t match what he said. It became clear to me that who I thought he was and what he brought to the table wasn’t accurate. So, I decided the relationship couldn’t continue romantically.

In my conversation with him, I explained why I couldn’t keep moving in the direction we were going. I also started talking about my value. I listed all the things I brought to the table: my ability to make money, my standing in the community, being a good mother, sister, and daughter, my education. I felt confident because I didn’t come to the table empty-handed.

But I realize now I was doing that because I felt like he didn’t value me. I wanted to prove to him that he was missing out on something good. And deep down, I was also trying to prove it to myself.

What God Showed Me About My Table

God revealed to me that what I brought to the table wasn’t really about my authentic self. It was about the image I wanted to project—the version of me that I thought others would admire. I thought my accomplishments, my financial stability, and my reputation were the things that made me valuable.

But God saw through all of that.

He reminded me that none of those things defined my worth. The only thing I truly needed to bring to the table was my authentic self—the person He created me to be.

I didn’t need to prove myself. I didn’t need to build a case for my value. Who I was in Him was already enough. And if my values and his didn’t align, that was okay. The relationship wasn’t meant to be.

Letting go of that relationship was hard, but God used it to teach me an important truth: I don’t need to seek validation from others. I don’t need to perform or prove myself to be worthy of love. And that realization, though freeing, didn’t mean I had to walk this journey alone.

God’s Table Is Different

Psalms 23:5 says, “You prepare a table before me in the presence of my enemies.”

David didn’t have to prepare his own table or prove his worth. God prepared the table for him, knowing exactly who David was—flawed, vulnerable, and surrounded by people who wanted to harm him.

What set David apart wasn’t his ability to fight battles on his own. It was his willingness to trust God to guide him, provide for him, and protect him—even when things looked impossible. But here’s something we don’t often talk about: David didn’t fight those battles alone.

God surrounded him with a community of people to support him and help him fulfill his purpose.

We see this same truth in our lives. God doesn’t expect us to figure things out on our own. He brings people into our lives to walk with us, support us, and remind us of His love and purpose. Therapy can be part of that community—a safe space to process struggles, find healing, and grow into who God created us to be.

David’s dependence on God wasn’t passive. It wasn’t about sitting back and waiting for things to happen. It meant trusting God’s plan, leaning on the people God placed around him, and taking steps of faith.

This is the kind of table God invites us to: a place of grace, connection, and provision where we don’t have to strive to prove our worth.

Thanksgiving and the Tables We Gather Around

This Thanksgiving, as you sit around tables filled with food and conversation, take a moment to reflect—not just on what’s on the table, but on the relationships represented there.

Are you trying to prove your worth? Are you expecting others to fill needs that only God can fill?

So many of us come to the table with masks on, bringing only the parts of ourselves we think others will accept. But what would change if we stopped trying to prove ourselves? What if we showed up as the people God created us to be—flawed but loved, imperfect but made whole in Him?

As we gather with loved ones this season, let’s also consider the tables we set in our relationships. Let’s ask:

• Am I showing up authentically?

• Am I bringing the best of myself—the kindness, grace, and love that God has placed in me?

• Am I seeing the people around me through God’s eyes?

When God prepares the table, it’s a place of grace, connection, and mutual growth.

What I Bring to the Table

Now, when I think about what I bring to the table, it’s not about my accomplishments or my reputation. It’s about the person God created me to be.

I bring kindness, honesty, respect, grace, forgiveness, mercy, and patience. I bring healthy boundaries. I bring love.

And I bring all of these things not because of anything I’ve done, but because of what God created me to be in this time and in this place in the world. God makes me desirable. His presence in me is what matters—not my physical appearance, my wealth, or my worldly knowledge.

So if I boast, I boast only in the Lord.

Final Thoughts

As we reflect on Thanksgiving and the relationships in our lives, let’s remember that what we bring to the table isn’t about our achievements or possessions. It’s about showing up as the people God made us to be.

And when we stop striving, we make room for God to move—for grace, healing, and connection to take root.

If this resonates with you, and you’d like to explore these ideas more deeply, we’re here to walk with you.